Bonjour, my beautiful bi bibliophiles! Question for you: If you had the chance to get back at a high school bully, would you take it? And if you did, what form would it take? Public embarrassment, slow and torturous? What if there could be an erotic element to it?
I know that last question was jarring. I meant it to be. Because there’s something particular about being bullied as a young queer person that hurts in a different way than garden-variety high school harassment — it’s a different kind of piercing. I’m not even talking about revenge, though — would you want this person to change? Or come to be a more empathetic person who worked through their issues clearly plaguing them enough to lash out at others? And have you, on looking back, realized that maybe down the line somewhere you were a villain in someone else’s story?
These were the questions rattling around my brain as I read Queering Him, the 2026 new-adult romantic drama from Katherine Wela Bogen. What kind of answers did I conclude with? And what does any of this have to do with bisexuality? Read on to find out.
But before I get into the nitty-gritty, my bodacious book club goers, I need to start with a few disclaimers. First and foremost, there will be SPOILERS for some parts of the plot to Queering Him — so please keep that in mind before reading more. Next, some content warnings include queerphobia, bullying, child neglect, alcoholism, BDSM dynamics, and suicidal ideation.
All set? Then let’s saddle up together.
Queering Him focuses on the two characters, Avra Bergman and Kieran Monaghan, mostly telling the story from Avra’s point of view. At the start, the two characters are sophomores in high school, with Avra being a proudly out gay woman and Kieran, a handsome but irritating popular boy, bullying her every chance he gets. But Avra senses that there may be more to his harassment — possibly an envy of her outness. The two spiral into a deeply obsessive relationship that pulls them into kink, self-discovery, and the unraveling of old childhood wounds.
First, I do want to give Bogen some praise for how she handles some very tricky subjects here. Regarding their queerness, though Avra starts off the novel believing she is gay, by Chapter 7, she realizes that her attraction to Kieran makes her non-monosexual, so she starts displaying a bi pride sticker on her backpack. And though halting and far from perfect, Avra does try to be empathetic with Kieran’s internal struggle with his bisexuality at times. I’m thinking particularly of her scene with him in the hall after graduation in Chapter 7:
Avra: I promise not to tell.
Kieran: I know.
Avra: And I promise not to make you say it. Not if you don’t want to.
Bogen also captures the smaller moments of being young and bi with real precision. In Chapter 5, after a breakup with a woman, Avra leans into a more femme presentation and suddenly finds more social doors open to her; at sleepovers, girls start asking her all the queer questions they’ve always wanted to ask, whether she wants to answer them or not. Or the biphobia from lesbians in college that was so rampant in the 2010s queer university culture in the US. (On a personal note, it’s that exact flavor of biphobia that was one of the reasons I didn’t fully come out until I was 30. Those glib, biphobic quips cut deep, y’all.)
Avra and Kieran also end up being developed characters beyond their bisexuality. Avra is smart and darkly funny and observant, but also comes from a rich cultural background from her Jewish roots, with a traumatic backstory involving her mother’s bipolar disorder and drug use, leading to years of child abandonment.
This leads to deep self-esteem issues about whether she is lovable, which, unfortunately, leads her to not always make ethical choices regarding Kieran. Kieran, for his part, does start to come to terms with his bisexuality in part through his shared sexual obsession with Avra, and does start to interrogate his sadist roots through their dynamic play. His trauma stems from his repressed bisexuality, and what his parents did in reaction to even thinking he was bi, which, in a way, is part of where his bullying towards Avra stemmed from.
As the two young adults explore kink together in the bedroom, often in ways that aren’t entirely ethical, I respect that they at least try to get better at verbalizing consent and respecting each other’s boundaries. Bogen always makes sure that they strive to use condoms and that there is always female pleasure centered in the passages of elevated erotica.
For her part, Bogen acknowledges that the characters are not always likable and that the unethical moves they make when they problematically engage in kink are meant to stoke introspection from the reader before they learn better practices. But these are still immature characters confronting their trauma immaturely off of triggering events, so it’s not exactly a blueprint for good kink practice.
These characters are moving through toxic situations in deeply unhealthy ways, and it can be a whole lot at times. It’s particularly hard to metabolize the way Avra treats Kieran about not being out yet, using shame tactics and breaking promises that could put his home situation in very real danger. It culminates in her being a psychological bully to him in return, and trying to justify it due to the way he treated her in high school. As smart and as educated as she is, she doesn’t always move with empathy — especially when triggered. It can certainly take one on an emotional journey, though not always a pleasant one.
Queering Him is a tough read. Those hoping that this would be a lighter beach read about queer millennials in their adolescent years will be deeply disappointed. I can’t say that the bi characters are evil or even purposefully hit bad bi stereotypes. Though I have empathy for them in many ways, they can be real jerks to each other and those around them in ways that veer into unforgivable territory.
Can I say I recommend it? That’s tougher to say. I’d say proceed with extreme caution, knowing your limits from what I’ve written, and if you think there’s something you can get out of it. But suffice to say it’s a challenging read.