Today is Bi Visibility Day, the final day of Bi Awareness Week. Over the past few days, I'd been contemplating what I wanted to write about on this day because it's an important one. It's kind of like Christmas for bisexuals, ya know?
Should I focus on the negative health disparities bi individuals face? Do I want to dispel myths about being bisexual? Should I encourage everyone to be as visible as possible on this day? Perhaps I could discuss how, being bi, attractions between the sexes ebbs and flows, and that's 100% normal? Do I want to talk about how I navigate being both polyamorous and bi? Or should I discuss the internalized biphobia we all face and how to overcome it?
I could keep going, but you get the picture. There were plenty of topics I could delve into on this fabulous day. As I was going through them, I realized that they were all, not necessarily negative (although many of them are) — but rather sad. They were all bound by the common thread: the trials and tribulations we face for our (bi)sexuality.
Honestly, this made me feel depressed. On this day, I want to celebrate being bi. I want to encourage others to come out and embrace the label. I don't want to bum everyone out on Bi Christmas, like some bi Grinch. I want everyone attracted to both men and women to shout from the rooftops why they fucking love — that's right — fucking love being bisexual. So I figured I'll start us off. Here are just a few of the reasons I love being bi.
First, I love the fact that my love transcends sex categories and appearances. I think, in a sense, that love from a bi person is one of the purest forms of love. I've never shared this story before, but when I came out to my father, he accepted me unconditionally. I was very lucky in this regard. I wouldn't say my father is a religious man. He does attend Jewish services regularly, however — I think the music appeals to him more than the religious aspects. Nevertheless, it’s safe to say that he's a spiritual person.
I didn't know this, but apparently, when he spoke to my brothers right after I came out to him, he said, "There's something incredible about Zach. It says in the Torah that God made man and woman in his image. Zach can not only see the beauty — but the godliness — in every single person."
When my brother told me he said that to them, I was shook. It was one of the kindest things anyone has ever said about me. I also loved that he was able to use the Bible to embrace and even praise my sexuality, as opposed to using it as a justification to discriminate. Those words have stuck with me. There's something pure, even godly (I don't want to get too arrogant over here), about being able to see the beauty in everyone — regardless of sex.
The second reason I love being bi is that it's fun! I feel like bi people can exist in both the gay and straight worlds — getting the best out of both. Yes, I know, sometimes it feels like we don't belong to either, but sometimes, it feels like we belong to both. I have a few straight friends who I'm very close with. The guys I was friends with years before I came out. They not only stuck around after I came out, but also embraced, supported, and loved me through my whole chaotic coming out process. Now my straight friends and I do very different things when we hang out than I do with my (newer) crew of queer friends. I can dance shirtless to Madonna with my gay friends, and be more "chill", so to speak, with my straight friends. I like having access to both of these universes.
Third, we're cool. It's like, have you hung out with other bi people? I feel like because we've dealt with such BS that comes with being bi, we have developed a hilarious sense of humor to cope. I mean, have you noticed how obsessed we are with puns? Many of us also don't neatly fit into the traditionalist ideals of society. That makes us freakin' cool. We're not boring. We're not like everyone else. We understand that sexuality is on a spectrum. We understand that gender norms are BS. We just, like, "get it", ya know?
So yeah! Thank the heavens I’m bi!
While there's a lot of nonsense we have to deal with, I would never in a million years wish I were gay or straight. I love being bi. I love being me. And on this day, I'm going to not only be visible but celebrate the fact that I am lucky — even blessed — to be bi!
Happy Bi Visibility Day Everyone!
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