My First Pride: Expectations vs. Reality

My first Pride celebration flew by in what seemed like the blink of an eye, amid a blaze of rainbow-hued fun. At the start of the weekend, I had had certain expectations — all based on the one Pride parade that I had watched while still in the closet. And while I can't say that my first Pride fulfilled all my expectations, it was certainly amazing. Since I had only been a closeted spectator beforehand, I really didn't know what to expect and the experience of attending Pride while out was different from anything I could ever have imagined.

The main thing I had been hoping to experience was a sense of community and, in most respects, I did find that. I saw people of all colors, genders, orientations, and body types out and about celebrating the LGBT community and advocating for continued progress — or even if they were just there to party, the fact that they were there at all was meaningful to me.

At one point, I got a little annoyed because it was so difficult to get through the crowds of visitors and reach the parade itself. A trip that would normally take me 20 minutes wound up taking over an hour and a half. At one point, I was about to complain about this to my friends, when I realized how petty that would be. How could I complain about needing a little extra time to get around the city when the delays had been caused by the enormous numbers of people who had to come to be part of the celebration?

Aside from that very brief spell of irritation, I had an amazing time throughout the weekend. I danced, drank, hung out with old friends and met new people — and not once did I feel the need to contain the LGBT side of myself.

Sure, as a bi man, I heard a few comments to the effect that "bisexuals aren't a thing" — but most people were supportive and even interested to hear my opinions on gender and sexual orientation. It made me realize that Pride is not just a celebration: it’s also a chance to learn and to challenge your preconceived notions of what it means to be a member of the LGBT community.

Another important takeaway was that there is no right way to celebrate Pride; you should celebrate however you want to. Don’t let anyone tell you that you're doing it wrong.

If you want to dress up in an outrageous outfit, do it. If you want to take your shirt off and spend all night on the dance floor, do it. If you want to march in the parade, holding a protest sign, do it. As long as you're there at the Pride celebration, you are part of something positive, something great for the LGBT community.

While the reality of Pride did not perfectly match the romanticized version in my imagination, I actually preferred the real experience. It made me feel as if I was part of something, something that mattered both on a personal level and on a grander scale.

It might seem trivial, but just being able to walk down the street wearing rainbow shorts and get high fives instead of sneers was an incredible experience for me. It’s little things like that that make you feel that you belong — something that has not always been the case. Those are the things that really made Pride for me.

I'm already looking forward to celebrating again next year. I'm sure that, with each new Pride, my perspective will change and I can't wait to see what I'll learn from my Pride experiences next year — and in every year to come.