Welcome to the new year, fellow bi bbs! We made it! Cheers, everyone!
I know, I know. Many of you reading this are probably not exactly in the mood for celebrating. Maybe you’re not happy about the state of the world. Maybe the dark days and cold nights are getting you down. Or maybe you’re just hungover. (Oh, shoot, was I too loud? Okay, I’ll lower my voice.)
But whether we like it or not, it’s time to tango with Janus, the Greek god of beginnings and transitions. He usually gets depicted with two faces, and for good reason — he is looking both at the past and at the future at the same time. And while that may be a bit too heady of a concept for those of us chugging electrolyte-laden drinks whilst binging shows, lying prostrate on a couch… it’s worth thinking about.
Today is a new chance for each of us to be a beautiful revolution in and of ourselves. I’m not saying today is the day to start training for a marathon (though, hey, if you’re genuinely feeling the urge, don’t let me stop you!). But what I am saying, from one queer individual to another, is that today presents an excellent opportunity to rejuvenate our sense of self and acknowledge our inherent worth.
So I’m not going to bore you with platitudes and promises you’ve probably heard a million times over. Because that’s for the straights, and we hear them every year. I want to conjure up a blessing, just for you. A bi blessing that draws on the traditions of others, but is specifically for this beloved community.
So grab your champagne — or Pedialyte, or any other non-alcoholic drink of your choosing — and raise your glass.
May you be accepted for exactly who you are — not “half gay, half straight”, but wholly, 100% pure, Grade-A bi.
May you encounter a bi character in a work of fiction that moves you to tears… of gratitude and recognition, and the glorious vindication of feeling seen.
May you find a partner that looks at you like my cat looks at a turkey sandwich. (I’d show you, but it’s too powerful to capture on camera.)
May you find multiple partners that serve your needs. (#SomeBisArePoly). Or may you not, as you so desire (#SomeAreNot), so you can focus on honing the unmitigated fabulousness that you are.
May you have orgasms and bi acceptance in equal measure — lots.
May you come to the conclusion that you are “queer enough”, no matter where you are on your journey to self-acceptance. Because you are.
May you leave all doubt of your queer identity — along with planking — back in the dust of the 2010s, where they belong.
May you only talk about your sexual identity when you want to — and if you want to.
May you only enter into or talk about threesomes when you want to — and if you want to.
May you be a messy bi, if that’s what you feel like being. Or not. Or anything in between. No matter what, you will find acceptance from me.
May you encounter nothing but acceptance and love from your family — be it the one you're born into or the one you choose and embrace as your own.
May your chosen family lift you and support you, but know when to challenge you to be the best version of yourself. And may you learn when and how to do the same for them.
May you continue to learn about yourself and grow in the next year — we only get one shot on this planet as far as we know (unless, you know, we get to Mars by 2030), so we might as well make it count.
May no one assume gender when you reveal you started dating someone new.
May micro-aggressions about your bi-ness be a thing of the past.
May more and more legislation and bi governmental representation extend the rights of our demographic.
May this next week, this year, this decade, see more funding given to bi-specific nonprofits and bi research, so we may better learn about ourselves and get our needs met by those in other communities.
May you feel free of fear in the straight community, and feel accepted and recognized in the LGBT community we helped to build.
May the tendencies for bis to be more likely to be poor and/or exhibit mental health issues get properly addressed, reduced, and even eradicated where possible.
May the terms “bi erasure”, “biphobia”, and “bi dismissal” become historical terms of days of yore, no longer used because they have become obsolete.
And perhaps more than anything, may you know and feel in your heart of hearts that you are not alone — that there is a whole community of bis out there who get you and understand your story, because it is their story, too.
Cheers to that.
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